Memoir writing: things to consider when writing a memoir

A memoir is undoubtedly one of the most personal genres one can choose. It may also be one of the easiest to write when it comes to content. The latter may come as a shock, I know. In this blog, I’m going to show you why I say that.

But before bombarding you with information, let’s start with the basics.

What exactly is a memoir?

A memoir is a genre in which one writes about a portion of their life – not their entire life (that’s an autobiography), not ¾ of their life, but just a part of their life. It is generally centred on a particular subject or theme. Examples may include: one’s love life, the life of a single mother or father, being a fatherless/motherless son or daughter, one’s battle with depression or anxiety, a major traumatic life incident such as rape – the list is quite exhaustive. The common denominator with all memoirs is their purpose: to make an impact. Memoirs inform. Memoirs educate. Memoirs ignite meaningful and life-changing conversations. Memoirs share perspectives. Memoirs connect people. Memoirs heal.

So, what is it that makes a memoir easy?

What makes a memoir easy to write is the content. A memoir is non-fiction, meaning that it is a real-life story. Nobody knows your life story better than you. You lived it, you experienced it. You know every detail. What may make memoir writing challenging when it comes to content may simply be not knowing how to expand the content, how to structure it logically so that there is cohesion, and not knowing what content is relevant. None of this is impossible. All you need is guidance. Here at Mpilo Publishing, we do offer 1-hour online video consultations to guide you through it all.

Now, let’s get into the crux of this blog.

Things to consider when writing a memoir

^{P.S: In August 2022, I had completed a UCT memoir writing course. Some of these tips are from the course, and others from years of being an avid reader and my experiences with authors.}

1. You’re exposing personal things (yours and possibly that of others)

It will take courage and boldness to be ok with revealing your secrets; even more so when your story needs to expose others in order to make sense and satisfy the intended mandate of the book. What will keep you unbothered by any negative responses and opinions about the exposure is the purpose/pure intention of your book. If it’ll be too much for you, consider writing a fiction book based on a true story and mix your story with false information and fictitious characters.

Another challenge with writing a personal story is that it may be so painful to relive it through the writing that it gets challenging to actually complete it. Writing it may even be part of your healing journey. Make sure you’re ready or are at least working on your healing. You also wouldn’t want to be emotional every time you talk about your book when it’s out.

2. Be objective

The last thing you want is to come across as bias or negative in your book. Therefore, avoid opinions, assumptions, deconstructive criticism, rudeness, bitterness and self-pity. Don’t lie about other people – stick to the facts.

3. Write in first person

Writing in third person may be an option to try out; but with memoirs, writing in first person is more impactful. The reader is hearing you; they connect with you because you’re speaking directly to them as though they are right next to you.

4. Choose a story-telling style

I didn’t know about this until I enrolled into the course. What’s great about choosing a story-telling style is that it gives you direction in terms of how to structure your book. Some examples of story-telling styles include:

• chronological style (telling your story from the very beginning to the end)
• circular (starting with the main event of your story, going back in time before it occurred and writing your way back to the event)
• non-chronological (an example of this is a collection of essays – where a chronological order won’t work for your book)

The story-telling style you choose truly depends on what your book is about, the content, and your intention with it.

5. Choose a starting method

Have you ever thought about how you will start your book? The opening line? How you start your book is critical, because it needs to grab the reader’s attention instantly so that they continue reading. Here are some exciting methods to start your book:

• a dialogue
• a question (it would be rhetorical, of course)
• a saying (perhaps a popular one)

6. Have a deadline

Setting a deadline is one thing, sticking to it is something else. Yet, having a deadline is necessary, because it will always remind you that you have something to do and that you need to complete it. Whatever deadline you set for yourself, whether it be a weekly deadline, a monthly deadline, or the final deadline for completion of your book, you have to be realistic about it, considering your daily schedule. There may be sacrifices you need to make (like waking up 30 minutes earlier or sleeping 30 minutes later to work on your book; or putting aside time during the weekend to complete a chunk of your manuscript). There may even be sudden setbacks, unexpected events outside your control that may affect your ability to meet your deadline. Extend grace to yourself, yes, but make sure you realign yourself to keep going until you’ve completed your manuscript.

Found this blog helpful? Leave us a comment below. If you’d like to book a consultation or enquire about Mpilo Publishing’s services, you can email admin@mpilopublishing.co.za.

Blogger:

Simthandile Mhlambiso – Founder and Managing Director of Mpilo Publishing (Pty) Ltd; Member of the South African Freelancers’ Association (safrea); Member of Professional Editors‘ Guild (PEG), Branch Secretary of PEG Committee – Western Cape.